Why can't napkins be more like tissues?

Some people have claimed that I'm overly negative, focusing primarily on overrated things. In the interest of being fair and balanced, here are some overrated/underrated couplets that have been on my mind recently.

Overrated: the month of July
Underrated: the month of March

Sure, July has the 4th, which is nice, but anything with fireworks as a central focus is probably a bit overblown. July is nice when you're young, because it means no school and lots of free time. But for most adults who have real jobs (and I'm not saying I'm one of them), it's not clear why July (or the summer in general) is any more special than other times of year. Plus, weather-wise, July is too hot, almost everywhere in the U.S., and certainly everywhere I've lived. March, on the other hand, while generally viewed favorably by most people, could be the best month of the year. In the south, the few days when the flowers bloom on the trees before any leaves start to bud are probably the best days of the year. In the north, the first sunny 50 degree day after a bunch of february snowfall, with rivers of melting snow on the sides of the streets, is pretty great as well. March also has the greatest sporting event of the year in March Madness (and I'm saying this despite the horrible sequence of events that has occurred in the current tournament).

Overrated: saying "the south of France"
Underrated: "southern France"

Seriously, why is France so special? Why don't people say "the south of California is just lovely this time of year?"

Overrated: tattoos on girls you'd expect to have tattoos.
Underrated: tattoos on girls you'd not expect to have tattoos.

Overrated: napkin dispensers
Underrated: tissue dispensers

The common napkin dispenser is one of the most poorly designed items I've ever encountered. I'm pretty sure that napkin dispenser technology has not changed in 50 years or more. Perhaps part of the problem is the lack of training or common sense among individuals who fill them. If filled properly, it's possible to grab the short part of the napkin and be on your way. But if the napkins are reversed, you have to dig your finger into the sides of the napkins and grab them, inevitably pulling out about 20 and dislodging the rest of the stack from the machine. Since napkin fillers are likely to remain stupid, I think the easiest solution to this problem is to make napkin dispensers more like tissue dispensers. Whoever designed the tissue formation such that pulling out one brings the next one into position for easy removal is a genius. And while I realize that napkins are a little thicker, I see no reason why a similar mechanism couldn't work for them as well.